A wobbly powerpoint slide introduces the evening.
THE UNIVERSITY OF EAST LONDON COLLEGE OF MEDIA (&FILM)
FILM DISCUSSION CLUB
PRESENT
Sianara MotherFucker
A life in Z movies.
A terribly middle class mature student in compulsary tweed bounds onto the stage beaming. Standing between two chairs he is our host.
Good evening ladies, gents and erm...ladies and gents.
Welcome to Sianara MotherFucker...oh gosh there's nobody under 18 here is there. I mean sorry. But we're rock and roll here. No boundaries. Bring it on. Yo. Anyhow.
Welcome. We're honoured to introduce Nathaniel J something the 3rd this evening who'll to be talking about his life, career, and ouvre. He is the self proclaimed king of the z movie. thirty years in made for rental action movies....(detail)
We'll be showing - if Kevin has worked out how the dvd player works - clips from some of his best work. But lets bring make Nathaniel (?) feel very welcome.
Nathanial J something the 3rd springs on stage - stlyishly dressed - cigar - very out of place here.
Nathanial - Hi Hi Fans.
Host - Fans (beat)is probably pushing it - sorry - they might not be too familiar with your work.
Nathanial - oh
Host - they'll like it
Nathanial - they will? They will. Everybody fucking loves it. Every - fucking - body
Host - Quite. Perhaps you could start by giving a bit of background to your ouvre in a bit more detail
Nathanial - ouvre?
Host - your works, your style, your genre.
Nathanial - my kinda movies?
Host. Yes.
Nathaniel - you want me to tell them?
Host - yes. Have you done this kind of thing before.
Nathaniel - not exactly like this no. My movies. Right well you know hollywood?
Host - yes.
Nathaniel - you know a little suburb called (xyz)it's kind of cheap, on the outskirts of town. Not sure if it actually counts as hollywood. You know.
Host - right
Nathaniel - that suburb is my kind of movie.
Host - errm
Nathanial - you know the red carpet set up. Premiers. Real like class shit.
Host - yes I've
Nathaniel - (interrupting )get that out of your head. You know Stallone.
Host - I[ve seen
Nathaniel (interrupting) Forget him. And everything he's ever done. he is dead to me.
Host - ok
Nathaniel - Dolph Lungren
Host - errm
Nathanial - I long to work with him.
Host - Im still
Nathaniel - you're in the video store?
Host - OK
Nathaniel - none of the movies you wanna watch are in.
Host - Right
Nathaniel - there's an action movie you've never heard of..
Host - Ok
Nathniel - about alien androids
Host - right
Nathaniel - with actors with exotic names you've never heard of.
Host - yes. yes
Nathaniel - so you reach out - you know it's ain't shakespeare, but you don't care, you just want a movie (beat) screw that. We're still not there.
Host - oh.
Nathaniel - cable tv. hotel room - business gig. no porn. only one english speaking channel.
Host. That it?
Nathaniel. Yeah That's it.
THE UNIVERSITY OF EAST LONDON COLLEGE OF MEDIA (&FILM)
FILM DISCUSSION CLUB
PRESENT
Sianara MotherFucker
A life in Z movies.
A terribly middle class mature student in compulsary tweed bounds onto the stage beaming. Standing between two chairs he is our host.
Good evening ladies, gents and erm...ladies and gents.
Welcome to Sianara Mother
Welcome. We're honoured to introduce Nathaniel J something the 3rd this evening who'll to be talking about his life, career, and ouvre. He is the self proclaimed king of the z movie. thirty years in made for rental action movies....(detail)
We'll be showing - if Kevin has worked out how the dvd player works - clips from some of his best work. But lets bring make Nathaniel (?) feel very welcome.
Nathanial J something the 3rd springs on stage - stlyishly dressed - cigar - very out of place here.
Nathanial - Hi Hi Fans.
Host - Fans (beat)is probably pushing it - sorry - they might not be too familiar with your work.
Nathanial - oh
Host - they'll like it
Nathanial - they will? They will. Everybody fucking loves it. Every - fucking - body
Host - Quite. Perhaps you could start by giving a bit of background to your ouvre in a bit more detail
Nathanial - ouvre?
Host - your works, your style, your genre.
Nathanial - my kinda movies?
Host. Yes.
Nathaniel - you want me to tell them?
Host - yes. Have you done this kind of thing before.
Nathaniel - not exactly like this no. My movies. Right well you know hollywood?
Host - yes.
Nathaniel - you know a little suburb called (xyz)it's kind of cheap, on the outskirts of town. Not sure if it actually counts as hollywood. You know.
Host - right
Nathaniel - that suburb is my kind of movie.
Host - errm
Nathanial - you know the red carpet set up. Premiers. Real like class shit.
Host - yes I've
Nathaniel - (interrupting )get that out of your head. You know Stallone.
Host - I[ve seen
Nathaniel (interrupting) Forget him. And everything he's ever done. he is dead to me.
Host - ok
Nathaniel - Dolph Lungren
Host - errm
Nathanial - I long to work with him.
Host - Im still
Nathaniel - you're in the video store?
Host - OK
Nathaniel - none of the movies you wanna watch are in.
Host - Right
Nathaniel - there's an action movie you've never heard of..
Host - Ok
Nathniel - about alien androids
Host - right
Nathaniel - with actors with exotic names you've never heard of.
Host - yes. yes
Nathaniel - so you reach out - you know it's ain't shakespeare, but you don't care, you just want a movie (beat) screw that. We're still not there.
Host - oh.
Nathaniel - cable tv. hotel room - business gig. no porn. only one english speaking channel.
Host. That it?
Nathaniel. Yeah That's it.
posted by Mike at 2:20 AM
1 Comments:
A wobbly powerpoint slide introduces the evening.
THE UNIVERSITY OF EAST LONDON COLLEGE OF MEDIA (&FILM)
CINEPHILE DISCUSSION CLUB
PRESENT
Erwin J. Breckenhause
Guerilla Filmmaking: A Life.
A terribly middle class mature student in compulsory tweeds bounds onto the stage beaming. Standing between two chairs he is our host.
Good evening ladies, gents and erm...ladies and gents.
Welcome to Guerilla Filmmaking: a life. Now, many of you will have been expecting "Lars Von Trier: humour and perversity in Denmark" Er.....I'm afraid we didn't receive the dvds, as, ahem, planned so tonight we are going introduce a real filmmaker with so much to share.
He's flown over from Romania to be here: We're honoured to introduce Erwin J. Breckenhauser this evening who'll to be talking about his life, career, and unique ouvre.
Erwin, has called himself the King of [reading from notes] mid-range, high-octane pan-European Adrenaline cinema. Over thirty years he has worked with the best, he's a two-time 'Golden Shepherd' nominee at the Oostend Film Festival, and a much commented on former BAFTA er.....member.
We'll be showing - if Kevin has worked out how the dvd player this month - clips from some of his best work. So everyone without further to do, lets bring out....
Erwin J. Breckenhauser!!!
EJB springs on stage - stylishly but over elaborately dressed - with cigar - and two bottles containing what appears to be water.
Erwin - Hi Hi Everyone, great to be amount the fans again.
Host [looks sheepish] Fans (beat)Welcome Erwin. Maybe some of our audience - sorry - might not be too familiar with your work.
Erwin - oh right
Host - they'll like it.
Erwin - I'm sure this crowd will. Everybody loves 'em. Something comes outta people after they see my movies, not like they shit themselves but....
Host - Yes. Quite. Thanks. Perhaps you could start by giving a bit of background to your ouvre -
Erwin - ouvre?
Host - your works, your style, what genre do you inhabit?
Erwin - my kinda movies?
Host. Yes.
Erwin - I should tell them?
Host - Yes. Like you'll have done in other interviews before [sheepish look]- you've done these before right.
Erwin - not exactly like this ...so, My movies. Okay well you know hollywood right?
Host - yes.
Erwin - you know a suburb called Brentwood, it's kind of lively but a bit dangerous, on the outskirts of town. Not sure if it actually counts as hollywood. You know.
Host - right
Erwin - that suburb is my kind of movie.
Host - errm
Erwin - I'll paint you a picture, you can close you fuckin' eyes if you want: you know the red carpet set up. Premiers. Tits and Tiaras- classy shit.
Host - yes I've
Erwin - (interrupting )get that right out of your head. You know Stallone.
Host - I[ve seen
Erwin (interrupting) Forget him. Frank Stallone was like a brother to my second cousin but now they are BOTH dead to me.
Host - ok
Nathaniel - Dolph Lungren
Host - errm
Nathanial - He won't take my calls but -
Host - I'm still
Nathaniel - okay you're in the video store?
Host - OK
Erwin - none of your classic rentals are in; your Tremors 2, Punisher, Driving Miss Daisy.
Host - Right
Erwin - there's an action movie you've never heard of with a guy who looks like Steven Seagal before he became a fat fuck..
Host - Ok
Erwin - about subhumanoid crazees
Host - right
Erwin - with actors you've never heard of who look familiar and kinda attractive on the back of the box.
Host - yes. yes
Erwin - so you know it's ain't shakespeare, but you just want some bang for you buck, and some definate thrills (beat) you know what-screw that. We're still not there.
Host - oh.
Nathaniel - You're in a Hotel room - watching cable but you can't order porno as your on business, the one channel showing ass-wrenching action, dubbed into Spanish.
Host. That it?
Erwin. Yeah I don't know about my ouvre. That's my shit.
(beat)
Host. Okay Interesting. Well its good contrast from last weeks Antonnioni discussion. Tell us how you first got into Films?
Erwin- Entirely by accident! You probably don't remember the directors strike of '77....
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