A wobbly powerpoint slide introduces the evening.
THE UNIVERSITY OF EAST LONDON COLLEGE OF MEDIA (&FILM)
CINEPHILE DISCUSSION CLUB
PRESENTS
Erwin J. Breckenhauser
A Filmmaker revealed.
A terribly middle class mature student in compulsory tweeds bounds onto the stage beaming. Standing between two chairs he is our host.
Good evening ladies, gents and erm...ladies and gents.
Welcome to A Filmmaker revealed. Now, many of you will have been expecting "Lars Von Trier: humour and perversity in Denmark" Er.....I'm afraid the dvds didn't arrive so we er, we are going introduce a real filmmaker with much to share about his exploits on celluloid.
He's flown over from Romania to be here: We're honoured to introduce Erwin J. Breckenhauser this evening who'll to be musing over his life, career, and unique output.
Erwin has called himself the King of [reading from notes] mid-budget, high-octane pan-European Adrenaline cinema. Over thirty years he has worked with the best, he's a two-time 'Golden Shepherd' nominee at the O0stend Film Festival, and a much commented on former BAFTA er.....member.
We'll be showing - if Kevin has worked out how the dvd player this month - clips from some of his best work. So everyone without further to do, lets bring out....
Erwin J. Breckenhauser!!!
EJB springs on stage - stylishly but over elaborately dressed - with cigar - and two bottles containing what appears to be water.
Erwin - Hi Hi Everyone, great to be amount the fans again.
Host [looks sheepish] Fans (beat)Welcome Erwin. Maybe some of our audience - sorry - might not be too familiar with your work.
Erwin - oh right
Host - they'll like it.
Erwin - I'm sure this crowd will. Everybody loves 'em. Something comes outta people after they see my movies, not like they - you know - crap themselves but....
Host - Yes. Quite. Thanks. Perhaps you could start by giving a bit of background to your ouvre -
Erwin - ouvre?
Host - your works, your style, what genre do you inhabit?
Erwin - my kinda movies?
Host. Yes.
Erwin - I should tell them?
Host - Yes. Like you'll have done in other interviews before [sheepish look]- you've done these before right.
Erwin - not exactly...so, My movies. Okay well you know Hollywood right?
Host - yes.
Erwin - you know a suburb called Brentwood, it's kind of lively but a bit dangerous, on the outskirts of town. Not sure if it actually counts as hollywood. You know.
Host - right
Erwin - that suburb is my kind of movie.
Host - errm
Erwin - I'll paint you a picture, you can close you eyes if you want: you know the red carpet set up. Premiers. Nominee-this, academy award winner that, a lot of boob tape - classy shit.
Host - yes I've
Erwin - (interrupting )get that right out of your head. You know Stallone.
Host - I[ve seen
Erwin (interrupting) Forget him. Frank Stallone was like a brother to my second cousin but now they are BOTH dead to me.
Host - ok
Nathaniel - Dolph Lungren
Host - errm
Nathanial - He won't take my calls but -
Host - I'm still
Nathaniel - okay you're in the video store?
Host - OK
Erwin - none of your classic rentals are in; Tremors 2, Punisher, Driving Miss Daisy.
Host - Right
Erwin - there's an action movie you've never heard of with a guy who looks like Steven Seagal before he became a fat fuck..
Host - Ok
Erwin - about subhumanoids from the wrong side of the tracks
Host - right
Erwin - with actors you've never heard of who look familiar on the back of the box.
Host - yes. Yes I think-
Erwin - so you know it's ain't shakespeare, but you just want some bang for you buck, and some definate thrills (beat) you know what-screw that. We're still not there.
Host - oh.
Nathaniel - You're in a Hotel room - watching cable but you don't order the porno as your on business, the one channel you can watch that has decent bone crunching action with explosions every 7.5 minutes, with dubbing into Spanish.
Host. That it?
Erwin. Yeah I don't know about my ouvre. That's my shit.
(beat)
Host. Okay Interesting. Well its good contrast from last weeks Fellini disputation. Tell us how you first got into Films?
Erwin- Entirely by accident! You probably don't remember the directors strike of '77....
THE UNIVERSITY OF EAST LONDON COLLEGE OF MEDIA (&FILM)
CINEPHILE DISCUSSION CLUB
PRESENTS
Erwin J. Breckenhauser
A Filmmaker revealed.
A terribly middle class mature student in compulsory tweeds bounds onto the stage beaming. Standing between two chairs he is our host.
Good evening ladies, gents and erm...ladies and gents.
Welcome to A Filmmaker revealed. Now, many of you will have been expecting "Lars Von Trier: humour and perversity in Denmark" Er.....I'm afraid the dvds didn't arrive so we er, we are going introduce a real filmmaker with much to share about his exploits on celluloid.
He's flown over from Romania to be here: We're honoured to introduce Erwin J. Breckenhauser this evening who'll to be musing over his life, career, and unique output.
Erwin has called himself the King of [reading from notes] mid-budget, high-octane pan-European Adrenaline cinema. Over thirty years he has worked with the best, he's a two-time 'Golden Shepherd' nominee at the O0stend Film Festival, and a much commented on former BAFTA er.....member.
We'll be showing - if Kevin has worked out how the dvd player this month - clips from some of his best work. So everyone without further to do, lets bring out....
Erwin J. Breckenhauser!!!
EJB springs on stage - stylishly but over elaborately dressed - with cigar - and two bottles containing what appears to be water.
Erwin - Hi Hi Everyone, great to be amount the fans again.
Host [looks sheepish] Fans (beat)Welcome Erwin. Maybe some of our audience - sorry - might not be too familiar with your work.
Erwin - oh right
Host - they'll like it.
Erwin - I'm sure this crowd will. Everybody loves 'em. Something comes outta people after they see my movies, not like they - you know - crap themselves but....
Host - Yes. Quite. Thanks. Perhaps you could start by giving a bit of background to your ouvre -
Erwin - ouvre?
Host - your works, your style, what genre do you inhabit?
Erwin - my kinda movies?
Host. Yes.
Erwin - I should tell them?
Host - Yes. Like you'll have done in other interviews before [sheepish look]- you've done these before right.
Erwin - not exactly...so, My movies. Okay well you know Hollywood right?
Host - yes.
Erwin - you know a suburb called Brentwood, it's kind of lively but a bit dangerous, on the outskirts of town. Not sure if it actually counts as hollywood. You know.
Host - right
Erwin - that suburb is my kind of movie.
Host - errm
Erwin - I'll paint you a picture, you can close you eyes if you want: you know the red carpet set up. Premiers. Nominee-this, academy award winner that, a lot of boob tape - classy shit.
Host - yes I've
Erwin - (interrupting )get that right out of your head. You know Stallone.
Host - I[ve seen
Erwin (interrupting) Forget him. Frank Stallone was like a brother to my second cousin but now they are BOTH dead to me.
Host - ok
Nathaniel - Dolph Lungren
Host - errm
Nathanial - He won't take my calls but -
Host - I'm still
Nathaniel - okay you're in the video store?
Host - OK
Erwin - none of your classic rentals are in; Tremors 2, Punisher, Driving Miss Daisy.
Host - Right
Erwin - there's an action movie you've never heard of with a guy who looks like Steven Seagal before he became a fat fuck..
Host - Ok
Erwin - about subhumanoids from the wrong side of the tracks
Host - right
Erwin - with actors you've never heard of who look familiar on the back of the box.
Host - yes. Yes I think-
Erwin - so you know it's ain't shakespeare, but you just want some bang for you buck, and some definate thrills (beat) you know what-screw that. We're still not there.
Host - oh.
Nathaniel - You're in a Hotel room - watching cable but you don't order the porno as your on business, the one channel you can watch that has decent bone crunching action with explosions every 7.5 minutes, with dubbing into Spanish.
Host. That it?
Erwin. Yeah I don't know about my ouvre. That's my shit.
(beat)
Host. Okay Interesting. Well its good contrast from last weeks Fellini disputation. Tell us how you first got into Films?
Erwin- Entirely by accident! You probably don't remember the directors strike of '77....
posted by Mike at 1:43 AM
1 Comments:
You remember the great directors strike of 77?
not entirely
Tullulah borgstien with the (mimes an impressive chest)?
Nope.
The incident with Sacramento fire department?
Sorry.
The mayor?
This could go on forever. I think it's safe to say we don't know very much about you. Why don't you start for the very beginning. Perhaps our first clip would help. This is from your first film I understand.
Really? You found that shit?
Kevin did..on ebay..how much was it kevin?
Never mind how much it was? How much was it?
99 cents
Like I said never mind.
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